Greatness has with it both stories of failure and of triumph. The best and most remembered stories are the ones told by the storyteller who lived the story.
Greatness Requires Cultivation
I have three sisters. We are a blended family, so all 4 of us were in a 3 year age spread. Growing up, I could see how these growing women would compare, compete, conflict and combat with one another, especially in our teen years. I look upon it as a necessary dynamic in those years in order for us to design and develop our own sense of self. It was necessary to bump up against who the 3 others were or were not, in order to sense in ourselves those qualities that were authentically ours. Who were we? Who am I? There were times I loved them. There were times I felt like I hated them. There were times I couldn’t live without them. Together, this dynamic created in each of us the best possible woman we were meant to become, each of us beautifully different and great in our own way.
Greatness Isn’t Always Great
As a divorcee, there have been times I’ve had to make hard choices on behalf of my children. One such choice was when I separated. We had agreed to move back across country for an amicable divorce. Their dad had previously worked for this same company he was returning to for over a decade which was approximately 1 hour or so away from our neighborhood. During the time he was relocated across country (both directions), he worked out of town and away from our children for a significant portion of time, weekdays away for months. So in order to foster amicability and co-parenting with their father, I began to rebuild my life in a place closer to his place of work, so our children would have the chance to see and perhaps do dinner with their dad after he got off of work on weekdays. I signed my lease, transferred my business licenses and began to build my life anew in this new location. Seemingly overnight, something their father said he couldn’t do in the 11 years of our marriage up to that point, he was able to do, begin working from home. This move ended up making me the parent who was now 1 hour away from our children on weekdays.
Greatness Can Be Unseen
Recently, I discovered something about my mom that I did not know. She was the first female to graduate from the University of Arizona with her Bachelors in Science in Physics. Wait, what? I had known she was among the few women in her cohort to graduate with this type of degree at that time, but the first and only female that year?! I was troubled. Could the greatness that lies within such pioneering women, be the very thing that has them not acknowledge it aloud to others? Could it be that as women, we’ve been conditioned to not speak up about our achievements and accolades, under the guise that it would be boastful or conceited? Or worse, that we are lulled into silence by the inherited discourse of what it means to be lady like, and not share our own achievements. How are we to celebrate one another and promote our greatness in one another if we do not do it for ourselves?
My Call To Action
Speak about your greatness. Share your stories of triumph. Share your stories of failure. Share your accomplishments. Share your heartbreaks. Share about being a daughter, a sister, or a friend. Share about being a divorcee, a widow, or a parent who has lost a child. Encourage and allow the same for others to share their stories without judgment! This is NOT boastful or conceited. It is something we can do today that can make a difference.
As my beloved husband likes to point out, at the end of all of His creations, God made woman. Like a magnificent masterpiece, once she was created, nothing was to follow.
Toni McGillen
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